Thursday, September 09, 2004

I have discovered a truth about myself. When flying, it’s imperative for me to be reading something that focuses me on who I SHOULD be. I am way too distracted by selfishness, comfort and timeliness. I have found myself getting irritated on flights by screaming children, or “loud talkers” or snorers. Suddenly, I found myself in many of those categories. My own children were the screamers on flights, my boisterous laughter and talking were annoying to others and I might have even snored once. Might.

Last week, as I flew home from San Antonio, I saw a family of 5 headed my way. The dreaded walk down the plane aisle. You all know it…the families with small children headed your way as you silently pray, “let this cup pass from me, O Lord”. Yes, this nice family shared my row and the one in front of me. They had a 4 yr old, a 2 yr old, and a 6 week old baby. They were frazzled, tired, and cranky. The dad and the 2 yr old boy sat next to me. Needless to say being 2 is really hard. Two year olds are not content to sit and read the in-flight magazine. There is much kicking, wiggling, whining, even crying. The mom in front of us was even more exhausted. She was tending to the 4 yr old while trying to calm the infant whose ears were apparently giving her some trouble.

I confess that my NATURE is to become annoyed and want to put a bag over my head. Thankfully, I was reading Henri Nouwen. It’s hard to be self absorbed while reading dear Henri. As I read about his move to the community for the disabled-giving up all titles and accolades, I was completely convicted.

Soon, the mom and 4 yr old in front of us had to visit the luxurious airplane restroom but were presented with a problem—what to do with baby. The dad took the infant and that was about the last straw for Mr. Two sitting next to me. He lost it. My urge was to crawl into the recesses of the airplane—to search for sanctuary in the baggage compartment. Thanks to Henri (thanks to His pointing to Christ) I tried to fight my nature and offered to help. The father quickly handed me the ear troubled infant. Almost immediately she quieted. I was so moved by her “tinyness”. I was taken by her little hands that clutched my finger and was reminded of two very precious girls who have somehow grown way too fast.

The mom came back and offered feebly to take her back but I said I’d love to keep holding her if it would help. The mom basically bear hugged me with her eyes. I sat and held this sweet baby for the rest of the flight—reminding me that life against my nature is ALWAYS better.

This is already long, but today a similar experience. I found a nice women sitting in my window seat. She looked at me and I mentioned that she was sitting in my seat. Her groan gave me a clue that she really preferred the window. I offered to just sit in her seat and that began a great conversation. She had never flown and was on the first leg of a trip to Denmark to see her brand new grandchild. Flying is filled with great stories!

All this time, I’m reading Lee Camp’s book Mere Discipleship. Geez. What a convicting book! We have been engrained to think about our “rights”, our convenience, etc. Amazing how counter those things are from the call of Christ. Taking up a cross and following in His footsteps is certainly neither convenient nor is it about me. How much I need that message every day to remind me that I am a child of the King—and living like that means service, service, service.

Love, compassion, selflessness, and joy are the qualities I desire. Lord, help me continue to die to myself. You are so merciful! Thank you for transforming us daily!

I wrote the above yesterday but couldn't get the blogger thingy to work. Today I am alive and well in Big D. I am driving to Waco this morning to meet friends, Stephanie Elliot Grosz and Martha Kate Stallings Gunn for lunch and then possibly some time at the cemetery. Thanks for your prayers while I'm gone. I'm really glad to be here but already missing Sheryl and my girls.

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