BST's Blog

I leave tomorrow morning for the West Coast where we will have our next ZOE worship conference. The College Church in Fresno has been one of our very favorite places to go. The people there are the very definition of hospitality. They have that reputation. (another friend who visited there for something said the same thing.) What a great way to be known! The "green room" is always stocked with lots of goodies.

The Shepherds there are hands-on, involved, engaged, passionate, and unified. I wish more of our elderships looked like that. On Saturday night each year, several of the Elders make an elaborate dinner--ribs, tri-tip (like brisket), asparagus, stuffed mushrooms, and the most amazing desserts you've ever seen. It is truly unreal.

I'll never forget the first year we went there and the entire eldership surrounded us that Sunday morning and prayed over us--very moving and passionate prayers. The Elders had tears streaming and MAN, did we! It is a very special place.

The theme to our conference this year is "Desperate". This is our first one on the road after our Nashville conference in October. I was thinking this morning that we have experienced some real desperation this week in regards to Chris Cope and the families involved in Abilene--especially the Bourlands. What do we do with desperation? It seems to be this enigma that taunts us. We are told to "be still and know that He is God" and feel the "peaces that passes understanding". Praise the Lord for those amazing gifts! But, what happens when those phrases seem empty? What happens when people in our lives are struggling to the degree that saying something like that might evoke a punch in the face? What happens when someone near to us is sitting on the "ash heap"?

There's something about this fallen world that causes us to feel desperation. All of creation groans with expectation for the time when God sets things right. There's a place in us that will never be satisfied by words or the things of this world. We are a part of the groaning. We see death and we groan. We see violence and we groan. We see poverty and hunger and we groan. We see suffering and we groan.

Sometimes, we learn the most from times of desperation. But sometimes the learning comes from suffering. Our tendency is to push the suffering aside and try to hurry to healing by skipping some steps. Maybe some time spent on the ash heap is good. Maybe when our friends are there what would help the most is our presence more than words. Maybe there's something God wants to teach us or sharpen in us through our suffering or the suffering of those close to us?

I remember people saying some pretty asinine things to me after losing my dad. I know they were trying to help, but grief and pain seem to short circuit our judgment. The best thing said to me was by Donna Reynolds. As she sat crying with me and hugging me, she reminded me that this world is fallen. God never meant for it to be this way. He never wanted death. It's not a part of who we were made to be. That made sense to me.

Desperation--it's a tricky thing. It can be Life to some and death to others. There's a Godly desperation--a hunger, a thirst, a gasp for the presence of the living God. God can use our desperation to soften our hearts if we'll let him. If we don't allow Him into those times, it's an opportunity for the enemy to tell us all kinds of stupid things.

Whatever desperation you're feeling today, may it be a tool that breeds Life and deepens your walk with Christ.

I'll close with these words of Job.

"I know you can do all things;
no plan of yours can be thwarted.
Surely I spoke of things I did not understand,
things too wonderful for me to know."

Please keep us in your prayers this weekend as we listen for the Lord, minister to people, and lift Him up in worship.